Okay, so I can officially say that I have tried and FAILED the Master Cleanse. What is the Master Cleanse you may ask yourself......I'll brief you. A horrible fad diet/colon cleanser.
So you have to understand that I had to convince myself into doing this in the first place. Which I obviously think myself to be stronger than I am! About a month ago I bought the book "Lose weight, have more energy, and be happier in 10 days" The title should have explained it all.
Right......okay, so the jist of this colon cleanse is to have ABSOLUTELY nothing to eat for ten days(like a fast, which i really think I would rather go wothout eating or drinking for ten days before i did the master cleanse again) Instead of eating, you drink a laxative tea at night before bed...........i am laughing hisertically right now because of how retarted this is on paper! then in the morning you have to down 32 ounces of water with 2 teaspspoons of Organic un-iodized sea salt. Okay......not so bad the laxative tea, really didn't do anything; Or so I thought until the salt water! It took about 9 minutes for the salt water flush, to flush! Bathroom seriously 10 times in 2 hours. Then you drink a mixture of water, fresh lemon juice, organic grade b maple syrup(NOT PANCAKE SYRUP......NOTHING EVEN CLOSE TO MRS. BUTTERSWORTH) and cayenne pepper. So you're supposed to do this for 10 days............seriously.......you have got to be kidding me! I made it through two glasses of that crap and gave up my Master Cleanse!!!
Well, i guess the saying is right "crash diets don't work"!
3 comments:
I guess you had to be there...oh, wait, I was. It was such an honor to walk this journey with you. Good times, good times.
Hands down, the STUPIDEST thing you have ever done...and you have a long list(ha-ha).
Yeah for blogging!!!
I've done the master cleanse, many years ago, but even if you stay on it longer than two days the only thing you get is light headed and a lot more trips to the john.
That's hilarious that you wrote this, because Mike and I are starting it tomorrow! We're not doing the tea, just the lemon juice-syrup-cayenne thing. I'm not doing it to lose weight, but to cleanse my liver. Apparently lemon is great for cleansing the liver. Anyway, I'm shooting for 3 days and will be SO proud of myself just making it that far! Wish me luck :)
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